There’s a Reason They Call it a Happy Medium

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Like a mother.

Recently, a recurring theme surfaced in our mom circles.

We used to multitask like a mother. But now…

Doing one thing at a time is all we can muster and as a result, we’re dropping the ball, taking more time to get things done, and feeling the pressure to retrain ourselves to get back to operating at an unrealistic pace.

Why is this expectation the norm and why are we allowing it if our own experience has proven it to be TOO MUCH!?

Happy medium.

We like to think most moms are doing pretty well. We define “pretty well” as doing most of the things, most of the time. 

Think about it… You have a packed calendar, a never ending to do list, a partner, 2.5 kids with all different personalities, a dog, a floating goldfish, a home to maintain, aging parents/inlaws, your own health concerns, a pandemic and a menstrual cycle to contend with. On top of that, you’re under pressure to eat right, exercise, raise incredible kids, be social, get “in the mood” and sleep 8 hours a night. Not to mention, if you’re a working mom, you have a whole career on top of momming to account for. Thank God for red lights on sunny days or when would we have time to pluck our chin hairs?

We have an opportunity. As we roll back into “normalcy” and “busyness,” let’s do it on our terms. Let’s define a new normal and shoot for the middle; the proverbial happy medium.

Discover grace in the middle.

Perfection is impossible and we don’t have to feel like we’re constantly failing. There’s grace in the middle!

Just last week I was feeling overwhelmed by my to do list so I took a good hard look at it and decided something had to go. I dialed my hairdresser and rescheduled my hair appointment. And, if you’d seen the silver streak highlighting my part that day, you’d know that was not an easy decision. In my vanity, I digress.

All that to say, give yourself grace and set reasonable expectations for yourself. Take over control of the fire hose and put a kink in it. Don’t shut it off entirely as there will always be more fires to put out, but get off the hamster wheel, remove your roller skates and aspire to do most of the things most of the time. Then, pat yourself on the back and acknowledge that you’re doing pretty darn well!

PSA: If you know that you should be giving yourself grace and letting go but the anxiety of life in a pandemic is keeping you from doing it, talk to your doctor. There are solutions available to help you find your back to your happy medium and there is no shame in pursuing them!

Skim The List

Every week, we go to the experts to bring you tips and advice to help you get your ship together. And you don’t have to be “shipwrecked” to glean something from their insight. Sometimes the view through another lens is all you need to have an aha moment that gives you a nudge in the right direction.

1. Mom’s tweet perfectly captures the dread of returning to ‘normal’ after the pandemic
2. Moms Have Held Everything Together This Past Year, Except Their Friendships
3. The Primal Scream: America’s Mothers are in Crisis (Turn your volume on for this one. WARNING: Contains adult language!)
4. 8 Tips for Post-Pandemic Parenting
5. Please Don’t Let Anyone ‘Pill Shame’ You If You Need Anxiety Meds During COVID-19
6. How to Say No When You’re Used to People-Pleasing

Bonus tips from Rachel & Amanda

How to get grass stains out of baseball pants

1. Rinse the stained pants with cold water.
2. Fill a spray bottle with 2 parts hydrogen peroxide to 1 part Dawn dish soap, spray the stains.
3. If the stains are stubborn, grate some Fels Naptha soap and melt it in a tub of warm water. Let them soak for 30-60 minutes.
4. Next, wet a sponge and use it to scrub the stains with more Fels Naptha soap
5. Finally, wash the pants on the cold setting in the washing machine.

Finding the rogue shin guard

We call this process the Afternoon Autopilot, and It’s not just for shin guards. 

1. Set a time each week day afternoon to prepare for the evening ahead. We like 3pm. Pick what works for you.
2. Take a quick glance at the calendar to confirm arrival times/locations/carpools/etc. for evening activities.
3. Check bags for gear, fill water bottles, pack snacks.
4. Make sure you have your chair, blanket, umbrella, masks, etc.
5. Start thinking about dinner. Is this a night we eat on the go?

Meal planning around busy spring schedules 

1. Take time over the weekend to plan your meals based on your calendar.
2. Jot down which nights you’ll be home and which nights you’ll be eating on the go.
3. With the busy spring schedule, it’s important to keep meals simple. Pick 5 things you know you’re family will eat and put them on a rotation. This is not the time to get fancy on them!
4. As you plan your meals, prepare your grocery list, categorizing your items to make your shopping more efficient.
5. When you get home from the store, prep anything that can be done in advance – wash and chop veggies, etc. for those on-the-go nights!

Getting ahead of the busyness will help! But again, remember to strive for the middle, because there’s a reason they call it the happy medium!

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